The case for acting first and then thinking

Conventional wisdom holds that parents should make several early life decisions for their children. Kids should start taking violin lessons at age three, tennis lessons at four. The earlier children start doing whatever it is their parent/s want them to do, the bigger head start they’ll have and therefore a more robust competitive advantage down the road. David Epstein, author of Range, dissents. Range is a book about the value of being a generalist rather than a lifelong specialist and points out that many of the most successful people in elite professional fields (sports, the arts, scientific research, etc.) succeed not despite the fact but because they were late to the party.

“For too long, we’ve believed in a single path to excellence. Start early, specialize soon, narrow your focus, aim for efficiency. But in this groundbreaking book, David Epstein shows that in most domains, the way to excel is something altogether different. Sample widely, gain a breadth of experiences, take detours, and experiment relentlessly. ‘Range' is an urgent and important book, an essential read for bosses, parents, coaches, and anyone who cares about improving performance.”

— Daniel H. Pink, author of the bestselling “When” and “Drive”

Epstein argues that parents should encourage their kids to try as many different things as possible—fill children’s lives with a wide variety of experiences. Then let them find their own way. Most of the time, big head starts don’t turn out to be difference makers. A wealth of diverse experiences can be.

A tip

Why would a high school student not want to seize the opportunity to spend several weeks abroad on a great adventure? The surprising frequent answer: he or she doesn’t want to spend time away from a sweetheart. Now, we have no statistics on this, but we’ve heard it more than a few times. Here’s a bit of advice: don’t let any great opportunity slip through your fingers—grab it! You don’t want to look the word “regret” up in a dictionary one day only to see your picture. A few weeks apart is not a disaster.

News Flash

Dateline QBE: The old world that many people say no longer exists… still exists. At least in many instances and places.

We are told that technology has changed everything. Well, yes and no. For example, we may use Skype to conduct a conference call, but we still prefer to go to birthday parties where people actually congregate. “A Skype party” just isn’t the same thing—no cake, no candles to blow out, no hugs. Sometimes technology is better than nothing, but love operates most powerfully face to face, the old-fashioned way.

Similarly, the foundation of a great education is still built —in large part—on the pillar of experiences. Online team sports can never replace the playing field. Online chemistry lessons can never adequately substitute for experiments in a chemistry lab. Nor can a virtual climb up a mountain ever take the place of the physical and logistical challenges (and final exhilaration) of a real ascent. Authentic achievements always convey a grace that virtual accomplishments cannot. Whether it’s building a boat, rebuilding a car, or sailing around the world, powerful emotional benefits flow from the actual doing.

At QBE, we’re all about the power of authentic physical and emotional challenges to transform young lives. There’s a time to put the smart phones down. Conquering real challenges brings a personal equilibrium and sense of self worth that, to be honest, you can’t find on the couch with some gadget in your hands. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways. If you want us to prove it, you know how to get in touch.

Living an Interesting Life

The Week recently posted an article by Eric Barker, the well-known blogger ("Barking Up The Wrong Tree").  The title: Seven ways to be the most interesting person in the room. Now, "interesting" need not imply narcissism or snobbery. It simply helps people avoid being a bore, which apart from anything else is an essential ingredient in the stew we call good manners. And, of course, it includes the imperative to be interested in others, as well. Eric concludes his piece:

And most importantly: Live an interesting life.
Remember the theme of Don Quixote: If you want to be a knight, act like a knight. If you don't read, watch, and think about generic things, generic things are less likely to come out of your mouth. This doesn't need to be expensive or difficult. Hang out more often with the most interesting people you know. The friends you spend time with dramatically affect your behavior — whether you like it or not. The Longevity Project, which studied over 1000 people from youth to death had this to say: The groups you associate with often determine the type of person you become. In The Start-up of You, Reid Hoffman and Ben Casnocha talk about how the best way to improve particular qualities in yourself is to spend time with people who are already like that. The best and most reliable way to appear interesting is to live an interesting life. [Emphasis ours] And to pursue that ends up being far more rewarding than merely making a good impression on others. [Though being somewhat impressive can give a major boost to your self-image and confidence.]

Hmmm. Sometime in your late teens sounds like a good time to start embarking on great adventures in interesting places with interesting people—adventures that will shape your character for the rest of your life.

Youth and Self-Confidence

In mid-January (2017), The Telegraph, a daily newspaper in the UK, ran an article under the headline "Half of young people have so many 'emotional problems' they cannot focus at school, study finds".

The following is an excerpt:

Professor Louise Arseneault, ESRC Mental Health Leadership Fellow at the Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology and Neuroscience, King’s College London, said: "Given the profound uncertainty surrounding recent political events and the fact that young people face the worst job prospects in decades, it's not surprising to read that one in four young people aged 16 to 25 don’t feel in control of their lives.

Professor Arseneault continued: “Although it’s obviously alarming that these concerns play on young minds, it’s encouraging to see that young people have an interest in actively shaping their own future.”

 Of those who do not feel they are in control of their lives, 61 per cent said they felt this was because they lack self-confidence [emphasis ours], and that this holds them back.

Sixty-one percent? Wow!

This blog is full of other posts, including links to news articles, that help identify the challenges of growing up in the modern world. Just scroll down. If you're looking for tried-and-true solutions, you have our coordinates.

Parents weigh in on purchases that are "worth the money"

In January 2017, Business Insider published the results of a parents' poll. They asked a group [size undisclosed] of adults with children of various ages "to weigh in on the financial side of having kids" and specifically, to list the parenting splurges they thought were well worth the money.

Sixteen expenses came out on top; among them: "summer camp," "educational resources," and "studying abroad."

You can read the article here.